A Silver Lining

Checking Out

Christopher — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 03:49:02 +0000

So I started work today.. at the Retail Giant’s Competitor! I got a call on Sunday from the Competitor asking me to come in for an interview the following day. I’m like, fuck, the Retail Giant doesn’t know what the hell is going on, so why not. My interview goes fantastic and they offer me a cashier position! ..with 3rd shift weekends. I live a 3rd shift life. I crash at 2A and wake up no earlier than 12P. Needless to say, I take the job. I went in for computer training/orientation yesterday and completed that 5.5 hour course in 3 hours! I kicked ass. The HR administrator training me was so impressed with my work that she made me her administrative assistant the first day of training! I did payroll for over 500 employees my first day! It was the greatest first day of work in recorded history!

Well, I went in for actual on-the-job training working at the register and whatnot. Eight hours on your feet is murder, but the job is totally worth it. The only piss-poor part of it all is the stupid rewards program they randomly “pre-approve” customers to participate in. After about every 15th customer, my computer announces that the current customer is pre-approved for the 1-2-3 rewards program! All I have to do is explain why it is so beneficial and how it is different from the regular rewards program that every customer is permitted to participate in. Allow to explain how drastically different these two programs are: “A” vs. “A”. It’s the same damn program! No one EVER signs up. BUT! I have to make sure I explain this to every “pre-approved” customer because if a Mystery Shopper gets “pre-approved” and I completely ignore it, I fail immediately. Stupid marketing schemes!

Moving on, she’s gone for four days. No contact whatsoever. Damn international calling.

I’ve been thinking a lot about post-undergrad school. I’ve been thinking how much I hate school. I’ve been thinking how my graduate program will fuck the life out of my brain. I’ve been thinking what else can I do. I’ve been thinking about a career change. I’ve been thinking how I do not want to check out of undergrad to just jump right back into grad school. I’ve been thinking.

I should know who I am by now
I walk the record stand somehow
Thinkin’ of winter
The name is the splinter inside me
While I wait

Where do I go from here?

Running In Place

Christopher — Fri, 30 May 2008 05:17:43 +0000

So I got the job at The Retail Giant after making a plethora of phone calls and getting transfered to everyone but Neptune, the god of the sea, himself. Upon this acquisition, my parental unit decided to throw a cocktail of “the-problem-with-the-youth-of-today-is-their-lack-of-work-ethic” monologues my way because yesterday some clothes were left unfolded. Now, sibling number one is never home, and sibling number two is rarely home. So, when my parental unit discovered this failure, S1 and S2 were conveniently not there. Guess who gets to hear about the clothes? Yours truly. This was yesterday (of which, I was awaken from my slumber with the need to get sick. Great start to the day, eh?). Anyway, parental unit apologized later that day, but now that I’m not starting my job until next Tuesday (meaning May is over), PU decided (today) to bitch and moan about poor work ethics and how PU just cannot believe those very dispositions have leaked into this residence. Irony: acquire a job and get pissed on for the poor work ethics of American teens.

I did get to officiate today. Sometimes I have off days and I botch calls every now and again. But the reverse is true as well: just like today. I was on, and I say that humbly. Consistent, no rules being questioned, not to mention the fact that it was a great game. Won in the bottom half of the last inning. Doesn’t get much better than that.

*SPOILER ALERT*
I then proceeded to go to see the new Indiana Jones movie. Isn’t Harrison Ford old enough to be the senior resident at a geriatrics facility? Surprisingly, however, the movie didn’t suck because he is old. The movie sucked because (set in the 1950′s or so) ET decided to co-star in it. It turned out to be nothing more than a space-alien movie, or, as an intended memorable line puts it:

Not space. The space between spaces.

Whatever. Going to the cinema that late at night brought back memories of Friday nights in high school and summers where me and my (now moved away) neighbor would stay outside just sitting and talking until our eyelids claimed victory over our ability to see. I feel trapped in this pissing-hole of a town. Beyond that, I feel trapped in this freaking life. I have one year left of my undergraduate schooling and I’m no more advanced in this world than I was when I had one year of high school left. The question is: where’s my escape?

I run
Till the silence splits me open
I run
Till it puts me underground
Till I have no breath
And no roads left but one

When did I lose my sense of purpose?
Can I regain what’s lost inside?
Why do I feel like I deserve this?
Why does my pain look like my pride?

I want to see some fists pumping.

The Impossible Acquisition of Employment

Christopher — Wed, 28 May 2008 05:26:04 +0000

Being home from college for the summer has it’s perks, but with it also has it’s cons. The major pain in my ass lately has been the hunt for a job. It seems as if no one is hiring, so I spent the first three weeks home getting rejected every day. I finally gave in and applied at The Retail Giant. Two days later, they called me back and asked me to come in that day for an interview. It turned out being two interviews and I was on-deck for another the following revolution around its own axis. I went for that, supposedly, final interview and was offered a job. “Sign here. Click here. Sign here. Initial here. $X.XX OK as a starting wage (like I had a choice, ha!)? Click ‘Accept.’” All that was left was a drug test. I left the store, went across the street, took my drug test, and began to wait for that one week to pass between the time I took my drug test and the time they told me they would have my results.

Tuesday (yesterday) was the end of that one week. I gave The Retail Giant a phone call asking about the status of my drug test and when I could expect to be oriented and trained. “I’m sorry. We have been told to freeze all hiring for a few weeks. We are not employing anyone at this time.” ?!?! I wasn’t asking for an application! It wasn’t like I was just now applying for a job! I had been told that the job was mine “pending the passing of a drug test.” Now, the job isn’t mine? I got laid off/let go before I even started?! Bull.

I called back two hours later and just flat-out asked, “I was given a job as 2nd-shift in-stock a week ago pending passing a drug test. Are the results in and when do I start?” The reply was pissingly hilarious. “You can call back on Thursday to get the results of your test but there has been a freeze on all hiring as of this week.” Basically, I can call The Retail Giant to verify that I have, in fact, been drug free for all 21-years of my life, but to get a job, not gonna be so lucky.

This all (save the “called back two hours later” part) went down 15 minutes after I rolled out of bed. So I begin reading the paper and on the front page of my daily distribution, The Retail Giant’s competitor is advertising their need for summer employment. I hop on to the internet and apply immediately. I then churn out a resumé for a temp agency that is also hiring. Fingers and toes crossed.

Later Tuesday evening, my parental unit brings home an application for…The Waffle House. They are hiring 3rd-shift servers, and since I live a 3rd shift life anyway, why the hell not. I’m going into my 4th year at my university, set to attain my B.A. by May of next year, and I’m filling out an application that has a test on the back of it asking me to make change when my guest pays with a “five-dollar bill ($5) and the tab is only two dollars and eleven cents ($2.11).” I then sit back and ask myself, what the hell is one more year at college going to change that three years couldn’t or failed to do? How will one more year make me so much more valuable to the working community?

At any rate, I still got to talk to her. She’s sick (sadness), but she’s still able to make me smile. The question still stands: is. it. right?

It’s all up in the air and we stand still to see what comes down
I don’t know where it is, I don’t know when, but I want you around
When it falls into place with you and I, we go from ‘if’ to ‘when’
Your side and mine are both behind it’s indication

it is all up in the air.